心口如一(之二)

Jun 24, 2024

你们说话,是就说是,不是就说不是。(雅各书5:12)

心口如一只是个开始,下一步就是言出必行。你既然说了,就要做到。如果你无意做,就不要说。我们对待别人的方式,决定了别人对待我们的方式。如果我们点头哈腰,就是训练别人来践踏我们。如果我们承诺管教孩子,但只说不做,就等于训练他们轻看我们的教导。如果我们的怒气使别人感到害怕,就是训练他们防备或疏远我们。为了打破与别人相处的消极模式,我们要从以下四个方面着手:一、尽可能地明确细化他们所做的令你不悦的事情。说“你对我不公平”,还不够具体。说“你把大半的事情留给我去做”,就清晰多了,同时也暗示了解决的可能性。二、省察你自己哪方面的言行举止导致了他们对你的不良态度。向他们抱怨或向老板报告,不太可能带来积极的改变。改变你在整个事情发挥的积极作用,能够促使他人做出改变。三、想好说“不”的时间和方式,然后付诸行动。与其为做大半的工作而深感不满,不如做完你的那部分就停下来。如果你代替他人做他们的那部分工作,他们就不会去做了。四、谨记,重新训练他人需要耐性。更改了旧模块之后,继续建造新式部分,直到别人做出如愿的调整。你要心口如一,言出必行。

The Word for Today is authored by Bob and Debby Gass and published under licence from UCB International Copyright © 2024

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